IFS Therapy: What to Expect

Walking into an Internal Family Systems therapy session might initially feel like an ordinary conversation - and in many ways, it is. As we talk about what might be happening externally in your life, I’ll be mainly drawing our focus to what’s happening internally for you. By “what’s happening internally” for you, I mean your reactions to things in your life - your thoughts, feelings, behavioural urges, beliefs, opinions, etc. Those are the things I’ll begin to reflect back to you as “parts” of yourself.

Gradually, we'll go deeper, engaging with your parts experientially. We’ll shift from discussing them to actively engaging with them (i.e., from talking about them to talking to them). Initially, this shift to talking to your parts (whether internally or audibly) may feel unusual or uncomfortable, especially if we’re working with parts of yourself you've long avoided.

Session to session, the focus might change. Some days we’ll do a lot more talking about parts, others we’ll mainly be engaged in talking to them. Either way, at the start of each session, we’ll begin with whatever is at the forefront of the present moment, using it as a trailhead. Those things might be the same week to week for a while. Other times, it might change each week. Either way is fine. And if what’s showing up in the present is connected to something in the past, we might visit it. If it doesn’t, we don’t.

If you still feel nervous about what to expect in an IFS therapy session, first, you’re not alone; most people are. And second, the good news is, whether or not we are doing explicit parts work (the talking to your parts stuff), I’m always coming from an IFS framework - so you can let yourself off the hook for figuring out if you’re doing it “right” or not.